After decades of coaching teams in every kind of setting, one lesson stands above the rest: without trust, teams struggle to engage in healthy conflict, commit to one another, hold themselves accountable and put the greater good of the group first.
Trust on a leadership team is like an offensive line protecting a quarterback’s blind side.
It isn’t built overnight.
It takes intentional practice, honest feedback and consistent follow-through.
When your team trusts one another to do what they say, communicate openly and handle conflict without taking it personally, they can move forward with greater confidence and alignment.
Here are 11 of our favorite trust builders you can start using so strengthen your team TODAY:
PS – we went over all of these in detail on our last workshop, make sure to keep an eye out for our next one so you don’t miss out on the great discussion!
*In each of these activities, I recommend you have your leader(s) of the group share first as you go around the table. Tee up these activities appropriately by stressing the importance of you as leaders being vulnerable first and foremost, setting the tone for your team members to follow suit, and thanking the group in advance for sharing and being vulnerable themselves. Also, don’t hesitate to share with your team in advance the activity(ies) you’ll be going through (especially the heavier ones) so that members can put good thought toward them and bring deep and well-thought-out answers to the table.
1. First and Worst Job
Share the first job (and/or first actual paying job) you ever had, as well as the worst job you’ve ever had. Encourage team members to not just share what the jobs were, but also the details of the role, how they got into the job, etc.
2. Biggest Trouble or Shenanigans You’ve Gotten Into
Teammates share the most trouble they’ve gotten into in their past, or maybe the shenanigans they once took part in as kids or teens and managed to escape or avoid trouble from it. You can also encourage sharing around the biggest lessons taken from those activities. Just a bit of caution with this one, as some individuals will hesitate to go all the way with this activity, especially if they have some very deep things from their past that they are not proud of.
3. Personal TED Talk
This is a great opportunity for teammates to take the stage as the teacher and share a personal passion of hobby of theirs, giving a short 3-5 minute presentation around it. Have them describe how it works, how to do it, why they love doing it, etc.
4. Assessments (Reach out to us for facilitation/workshops around these)
The 6 Types of Working Genius – Measures where an individual finds energy in his/her work – from big thinking down to the actual doing of the work (wonder, invention, discernment, galvanizing, enablement and tenacity).
Kolbe A Index – Measures a person’s instinctive method of operation (MO). Unlike personality or cognitive (IQ) tests, it isolates the conative part of the mind (your purposeful efforts and natural instincts). It identifies how you naturally execute tasks and solve problems.
Culture Index – Maps out a person’s “natural traits” (their authentic behavioral style) and “job traits” (the behaviors they adapt to fit their work environment).
Predictive Index – Used to measure workplace behaviors (dominance, extraversion, patience and formality) and cognitive abilities (general ability, critical thinking, capacity to learn and adapt to new concepts).
5 Languages of Appreciation – Measures how individuals differ in their preferred style of appreciation (quality time, tangible gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service and appropriate physical touch).
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument – Measures how individuals handle conflict (competing, avoiding, accommodating, collaborating and compromising).
5. Life’s Defining Moments
Share the most impactful and defining moments in your life that have truly shaped you and led you to where you are today. Encourage team members to think back through major happenings, pivots, decisions, etc.
6. Personal History
Each team member shares a 4-5+ minute summary of their personal history, starting with their background growing up, siblings and parental scenario, interests and activities as a kid and teenager, schooling, work history, etc. This may bring about some great questions from teammates, so don’t hesitate to take a quick minute after each individual for questions.
7. Personal BHAG
Business management author great Jim Collins refers to it as the BHAG, or the big, hairy, audacious goal. This is a fantastic opportunity to share within your team where each member hopes to be personally, as well as professionally, in 10 years. Be aware that you may have teammates that have never really thought about this one, so don’t be afraid to give everyone a few days or a week to think about this topic and write down some thoughts before you go through it together. It also helps if whomever is teeing up this activity to preface it with the concept that it’s OK if a team member’s 10-year dream is beyond the current team or organization–show an appreciation for growth and development.
8. When I am the Happiest/Saddest
All of us have ups and downs, and at the heart of it all are very personal emotions and connections that have a strong influence. Individuals share when in life they are the happiest and saddest, giving team members a glimpse into their personal values and what is truly important to them.
9. Biggest Fear(s) and/or Self-Limiting Belief(s)
Take turns sharing biggest fears and self-limiting beliefs in life, many of which have a deep connection to life happenings that may be revealed. Sharing these provides a great opportunity for insight and to possibly help with what may be holding teammates back from reaching a higher level personally and professionally.
10. 4 H’s – Hardship, Heartbreak, Hero, Highlights
There’s a reason that this is one of the highest-ranking activities on this list, as I’ve yet to ever go through this activity with a team and not have major tears and emotions shared at some point. In this activity, each team member shares:
- What has been their biggest hardship or struggle in life.
- Who or what has been their biggest heartbreak or disappointment.
- Who their biggest hero has been in their journey of life (some team members may have a few that were more prominent at certain points in their lives).
- What has been their biggest highlight or success of their life.
*Plan on a good 10-15 minute break after this activity, as it may be emotionally draining for many.
11. Superpowers and Opportunities
This is my favorite and most powerful trust building activity that I implement with teams regularly during coaching sessions as it’s a total game changer for teams. Teams find that once these items are aired and said out loud that they don’t find it awkward to mention or confront these items anymore, opening a wealth of trust and breakthrough as a team.
Give each team member 10-15 minutes to brainstorm (or you can prepare everyone with the activity a day or two in advance) before sharing with each of their teammates:
Every other team member’s superpower(s) (what they best excel at) and biggest area of opportunity(ies) for improvement. Encourage the team to not discuss details in the moment, but to take questions offline and outside of the meeting if they need further clarity on any of the items mentioned. This provides top-notch opportunities for connection.
To go through this activity very specifically:
- The leader takes feedback from each team member around the table first, showing the ability to take praise and criticism equally (It’s very important for the leader to set the tone and stress to the team to NOT hold back in sharing ANYTHING.)
- Once all team members have gone, we provide the leader with a minute to ask any quick questions for clarity and the opportunity to provide any brief feedback.
- Next person goes in the same manner that we provided feedback for the leader and so on until all team members have received feedback from all other team members.
- This exercise provides a fantastic opportunity to identify personal areas of improvement that team members can goal set around and build strong intentionality and plans for improvement. It also functions in pointing out blind spots for others.
*A Few Reminders
- Let your leader show vulnerability and set the tone by going first.
- Give teammates time to prep for the deeper and emotional activities that take some thought and reflection.
Choose one of these and make a plan to implement it within the next couple of weeks!
BONUS TOOLS: Checkout some of Patrick’s favorite activities here!
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